YOU KNOW YOURE ADDICTED TO COLLIES WHEN:
You find yourself standing in a store "stacking" a stuffed Collie toy
The flood specialist uses your Metro Airforce dryer to blow your carpets
clean because it is more powerful than the one he has.
When you go to the expense of installing a double basin wash tub so you can get
the Collie into it, and find yourself drawing blank looks from the clerk when you try
to explain why the height of the wall between the tubs is important!
When the shelf over the wash tub contains more shampoos, conditioners,
sprays and mousse for the Collies than you have upstairs in your own bathroom
When there are an excess of 15 various sized brushes and combs for the
Collies, but you can't find one for your own hair
When the decision about what couches to buy, hinges on which will showthe least dirt and Collie hair.
When Quicken points out the largest single expenditure account in your
checkbook is the one entitled Dog Costs-Maintenance, Vet, and Show/handler costs
When you write out a check for an entry fee before you pay the gas & electric bill
When you get your cell bill, and find it to be $1000 and all the calls are to your dog friends and handler
When you don't bat an eye at paying in excess of $200 for special treats,
grooming items or dog toys etc. but balk at paying more than $40 for your own winter shirts.
When you tell your husband you dont have a thing in the house to make
for dinner, but just finished feeding the dogs 10 lbs of chicken wings, and grated veggie medley.
When your mail consists of probably 15-20 dog supply catalogs, but cant
remember the last time you heard from your sister.
When the UPS man accidentally leaves a package of dog supplies at your
door because he delivers so many of them to your address.
When you do, finally, get a Dog items catalog from Orvis, then e-mail the publisher and
complain that the only dogs represented are labs and goldens. What's the matter with these people?
When the VISA people call you to confirm a purchase on your charge account because it is not dog-related
When you won't buy a breed-decorated item unless it is conformationally accurate
When you find yourself standing outside at 6:00 am in the morning in your nightclothes and robe,
playing with puppies in the rain or snow but
tell your hubby its too cold to come give him a kiss goodbye in the car
When your husband purposely fixes a larger portion of something good for
dinner because he knows you are going to feed it to the Collies
When you get asked to make some extra money filling in at your old
office for a week, your first thought is,"OOH! I can use the money for entries!"
When friends visit, and you hear one say to another as they observe the
dog freezer in the garage filled with steak & chicken, "those dogs eat better than we do"
When non-dog company is expected, and you are more concerned about the
Collies grooming than you are over the condition of the house.
When you think of the many friends who lost dogs during the course of the year,
and you still cry at the memory
When your Christmas list consists of nothing except grooming equipment and dog books.
Your Christmas card list for family is 20, for dog friends: 60.
You take your dogs in regularly to get their pictures taken, but havent
taken professional pictures of your kids in a year.
When you spend in excess of 2 hours in a crowded store looking through
1/2 price Christmas ornaments to see if there are any Collie ornaments there
When you'd rather be in the basement brushing out a Collie than cuddling
with your hubby on the couch in front of the tv.
When you go shopping for baby stuff for your new grandchild and find yourself ending up
in the pet section having more fun looking for something to take home to your Collie
Your vacations are planned around shows or litters
And finally, when you lie in bed at night, and listen to the soft,
breathing sounds of your husband and the four Collies,
and know all is right in your part of the world